Thursday, April 19, 2012

New Bundle of Joylousy

To the untrained eye, it may look like I have been away vacationing in Cannes or took some time off on my private boat. But any mommy would know the truth is far less glamorous. 

Indeed, I am still where I was months ago, except now, I am there with a double bill of craziness. Not that I am missing my nausea-days and the fancy pregnancy look but let's face it, two babies could drive even the zenest Dalai Lama to join Shaolin monks on tour.

Do not get me wrong, I absolutely and unconditionally adore Mia and Jad but they have the amazing (I believe magical super power) skill to get hungry at the same time and poop at the exact moment! This can give an entirely new meaning to multi-tasking, trust me. 

Just yesterday, I was burping Jad on my shoulder, holding him with one hand and rocking Mia to sleep in her stroller with the other, all the while singing lullabies with the softest, most maternal voice I could muster. Yes, night routines can be tricky like that.

All that, I can manage. With a little help from my slave (i.e. my mom) things can even run surprisingly smoothly.

However, what is unimaginable and completely insane, much less manageable, is jealousy. Mia is having a hard time sharing her loved ones, her home and even the air she breathes with her little brother. So much in fact, she is breaking our hearts. And ears. 

A little tension was expected. So was a little conflict. Resistance on Mia's part was even understandably reasonable for a one-year old baby. But the degrees her inner pain is reaching is truly overwhelming and distressing. 

Her tantrums are not those of a spoiled little brat. She is truly in pain. And it is the sort of pain papa and mamma cannot save her from. We actually kind of caused it.

However, the guilt feels a little less heavy now that other friends have shared their personal stories. Apparently, it does not matter what age your first child is, a newcomer will always engender siblings rivalry.

So yes, when the child is a bit older and can understand certain concepts and their meanings, you can probably prepare them emotionally and psychologically to a certain extent. Nevertheless, they will feel betrayed when that new little bundle of joy takes some of their previously unshared care.

And as we were sharing experiences, I heard the funniest stories:

A little one who could formulate sentences requested from his parents to "return that baby to the hospital, it's been a week already!" while another older one started throwing anything he could get his hands on out the window every time he felt that urge to express his frustration somehow.

And then, there is even the funnier stories of adult acting all weird and insane just because they are jealous of relatives or friends. I will not go into details here because some readers might recognize themselves or others and we do not want to offend anyone, now do we? ;)


It is going to be difficult for Mia (and all of us) but she will adapt. And soon, she will learn her brother is in fact the best friend she will ever have. I should know, I am a first child myself :)

Mamma Mia

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